Common Misconceptions About Filipino Australian Relationships — ‘mixed race’ couples in Australia

‘Mixed-race’, ‘interracial’, ‘transnational’, ‘intercultural’. These are the words often used to describe relationships as such. Beyond the adventure-filled romance, we all know that being in one guarantees unwelcome judgement and misconceptions. This post leans more towards Filipino Australian relationships because that’s what I’m most familiar with but I’m sure these also apply to other transnational couples. 

Scammers/ gold diggers

I’ve put this on the top of the list because the most common misconception when it comes to Filipino Australian relationships is that all Filipinas who marry Australians or any ‘white’ fella for that matter, are scammers/ gold diggers. I suppose, this isn’t completely baseless as there have been many instances where this was indeed the case. I’ve personally met a number of them, unfortunately.

But don’t be so quick to judge. Just because there are some cases like this, doesn’t mean that every Filipina who’s with an Aussie is a gold digger. A lot are hardworking individuals who value self respect and dignity more than money.

Financial dependence on the Australian half of the relationship

This is in connection with the point above. Many people assume that the Filipino half would financially be depending on the Australian half of the relationship. I have a few issues with regards to this misconception, these are:

• I don’t see anything wrong with a stay-at-home wife who is financially dependent on her husband. Who is anyone to judge if this is the set up that they’ve decided for themselves? Doesn’t automatically mean that she’s in it for the ‘money’. 
• As I have mentioned in one of my previous blogs most families in Australia need two incomes so both would most likely be earning money for the family.
• It’s also possible that the Filipino has more money than the Australian. 

The submissive wife

They do it for the citizenship

Believe it or not, not everyone wants to be in Australia. Of course, there are a lot of benefits in being here. I’ve written and will continue to write all about them. But when a person moves away from his country because he fell in love with an Australian, he’s also sacrificing being with his friends and family, the comfort and familiarity of being in the country he’s known all his life, and the life that he’d already built for himself. But then again, this isn’t completely unfounded because there are people who would do it only for the citizenship.

It won’t last

The odds are against Filipino Australian couples with things like cultural differences, language barrier, and the distance. This is why many think that these relationships won’t last. Though those things don’t make it easy, these aren’t good enough to break a strong bond if both really want the relationship to work.

He couldn’t find someone in Australia

The stereotype is a desperate, crusty, old, fat, perverted white guy whom no one from his country could ever possibly like so all he could get is a provincial, ‘exotic’, poor, single mother from a country like the Philippines. Not only are these adjectives mean and uncalled for, Filipino Australian relationships are as diverse as any other relationship.

Age gap

Australian male with a Filipina (or other female of a different ethnicity)

Though it really is more common for the Australian to be the male and the Filipino to be the female, just like with everything else in this list, not always. I know of multiple couples where the Australian in the relationship is female, and it seems to be on the rise for Australian ladies to look elsewhere for love too.

They either met online or in a bar

The world as we knew it has long changed. We use our gadgets and the internet to connect us to the rest of the world. It should’ve been obvious that it would change the way that people meet and start a relationship. I think it’s time that we get over it, it’s just kind of how it’s done nowadays. 

Surprisingly, not all Filipinas work in a bar. Some are lawyers, accountants, diplomats etc. And I’ve heard that a person’s job doesn’t always define a person. Interesting, don’t you think?

Anyway, Filipino Australian couples find their way to each other differently. Sometimes they meet at work, at school, or maybe while one is travelling in their respective countries.

Mail order bride

This is such an unfair stereotype. Is this even legal? Pretty sure it’s basically human trafficking. I guess this is more of a racial slur than an actual thing. The point is, we are not for sale.

Conclusion

It can be hard to get rid of misconceptions because making judgments about each other comes as natural as a habit does. Sometimes even if we don’t say it, we can’t help ourselves from thinking it. But we have to remember that even if these stereotypes seem to be a fun topic to gossip about, they can negatively impact someone’s emotional well-being.

There are many more misconceptions about intercultural relationships that I have not addressed in this post. I’m thinking of some more as I write this but the list would end up being too long. Maybe I’d write a part two of this. What do you think?

Disclaimer All content and information in this post is for purposes of sharing my experiences only, does not constitute professional advice and does not establish any kind of professional-client relationship.

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